Friday, 16 December 2011

The Tale of Bad Larry.....

Whoever says that television doesn't influence people, obviously hasn't met my boss. After watching an episode of "Life's Too Short", my boss decided that what I needed more than anything, was an image makeover.

He's kind and helpful like that.

Mark (my boss) decided that being a nice guy wasn't getting me anywhere. My thoughts on the matter were inconsequential apparently, and it was decided that I should from now on be both "bad" and "dangerous" - and should introduce myself from now on as such.

In fact my boss is so thoughtful, that he offered to introduce me to people (especially female people) himself. If we were in a pub for example, I would be sitting a little way away in my leather jacket with the collar turned up. Mark would be talking to a couple of women (safety in numbers), and when he would point me out, saying "That's Larry - he's bad.", I would simply raise my glass looking mean, moody and magnificent. And then the women would not be able to resist.

Well that is the theory anyway. When Mark demonstrated how I should look when I raise my glass, he looked like he'd had a stroke.

So last night was our Works Christmas bash. A simple affair, we went to the pub, then to an Indian Restaurant, and then back to the pub. There were seven of us in total - Mark and his partner Petra, Mark's daughter Tiffany, one of our suppliers Neil, two people from our Packing House Gail and David, and me.

Now my boss has been known -on rare occasions- to take the mickey out of people. With the addition of alcohol to the equation, the frequency of Mark's 'boyish humour' increases substantially. So for pretty much the entire night, each of us was given the benefit of Marks wit.
The subjects covered included: whether David was gay, whether Gail fancied me, and of course my new image re-branding. These topics would be revisited time and again as the evening wore on.

However let me say that Mark took a fair bit of stick himself, and paid for the whole night - drinks, meal everything. He is very generous like that.

But you have to expect the mickey taking too.

So Mark thinks I should be a bad boy - or at least have a bad boy image. I'm not sure I could quite carry it off with the panache that Mark suggests I would need.

Bad Larry........what do you think?

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