Wednesday, 26 October 2011

Smug Software

Have you ever noticed how arrogant your AntiVirus software can be?
At work we have AntiVirus software which is free to download - I won't say which one but the AntiVirus is Very Good (capital letters are deliberate).
However, I don't need to know how good it is. I was happily working away, when this message window appears saying "Avg recently protected you from a serious threat". As smugly as it slid into view from the taskbar at the bottom of my screen, it smarmily slid out of view again.

Really? Did my AntiVirus software really tell me that? I couldn't care less to be honest! I don't need to know whether my AntiVirus software has protected me everytime it detects and prevents a threat - that's its job! That is what I expect it to do, and I don't want or need to be told everytime it does what it was designed to do.

These messages are meant to make us worry, and make us question whether we have adequate protection (in the hope that we upgrade or buy more powerful version of the software). Well I'm not worrying. The only time I'll worry will be if I get a message pop up that says:

"Your computer is infected by a virus.  I saw this virus coming, but at the time I couldn't work out if it was a virus or just an old copy of your CV. By the time I realised it was a virus, it was too late. Sorry lol"

If I see that type of message from my AntiVirus software, then I will be concerned.

I was quite taken back by the arrogance of the message I got. I mean, you wouldn't expect to get a knock on the door at half two in the morning from a couple of policemen who just thought that you'd like to know that they arrested a man breaking into an identical house two streets away - and that he was a big bloke too!.

Nor would you expect a phone call from the local fire brigade about how they pulled three people out of a burning building across town, and how lucky those people were that the fire brigade are so helpful!

My AntiVirus software is so great it chooses to check for updates every morning just after I get in - in spite of the fact that I manually set the day and time for updating - so that my pc runs slower than if it was made entirely out of wood, and powered by two disabled hamsters in a knackered old wheel. And just while I am trying to check for emails!

Bring back pen and paper I say......

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