Sunday, 17 July 2011

Truths of Life

Here are some well known (and lesser known) truths of life:

Starting a sentence with the phrase "I don't mean to be rude, but...." gives you the right to be as rude as you like.

Your sense of smell is no where near as good at telling if something is off as your sense of taste.

Earrings on babies is WRONG.

When trying to remember the name of someone famous that you have temporarily forgotten, you are legally allowed to kill anyone who says "I'll give you the first letter of their name".

There is no such hair colour as "Strawberry Blonde" - you're Ginger.

Doga are better than people because they wag their tails rather than their tongues.

The current Health & Safety overkill, and the "No Win - No Fee" culture means that Common Sense is an endangered species.

75% of people that park in a Disabled spot are not Disabled.

There's never a pen when you need one.

Those of us who chew our pens at work and use them to clean our ears, will inevitable clean our ears and then chew straight after at some point.

People only tell you to "mind your head" just after you've cracked your skull on something.

There is no right answer when a woman asks you for your opinion on her outfit.

One in Three people (25%) can't do basic maths.

The moment you move into a queue of traffic, it stops moving.

When we finish a really good meal, we all secretly want to lick the plate.

The Three second rule is often ignored.

Everyone has a favourite Spice Girl.

No-one likes the Ginger one out of "Girls Aloud"

Pretending to throw the ball for a dog is the closest most of us will ever get to being a magician.

1 comment:

  1. I feel your post is a little racist towards those of us lucky enough to have red hair!! I could be cruel and say at least I have hair but that's not like me is it? ;)