Friday, 15 April 2011

Brain. Shrink. Cougar Vs Shrimp

Before I went to work this morning, I prepared my lunch. When I say prepared,  I mean put a sachet of Tomato Cup-a-Soup and two Ryvita in my lunchbox and closed the lid. I put my lunchbox on the kitchen side, and the Ryvita packet back in the cupboard. I then made my self a cup of tea, and sat in the lounge and watched the breakfast news..
Soon enough, the time came for me to leave for work, so I put on my trainers, fetched my coat, and went to grab my lunchbox off the kitchen side.
Except - it wasn't there.

Now my kitchen is not very big, and my lunchbox is not very small (feel free to supply your own innuendo here) - so locating it should not have been a problem. One 360 degree turn later, I was still without my lunchbox. I tried to think back to when I prepared my lunch, but could not visualise in my head what I had done with it. There was nothing else for it; a systematic search of my kitchen was required. I opened the cupboard nearest to me - and there was my lunchbox, waiting patiently to be discovered, next to the packet of Ryvita I had put away. Obviously, but for some unknown reason, I had put my lunchbox in the cupboard with the Ryvita. What is worrying though is the fact that I have no memory at all of doing it.

However, I do have a theory regarding why I did it.

As you all know, when we are asleep our bodies rest and recuperate. Our brains rest too - but they also work. They consolidate all the information we have absorbed during the day - both consciously and subconsciously - and create memories and links between bits of information. Think of it like the "Disk Defragmenter" on your PC - consolidating information, maximising the available space, and improving the capacity and speed of your brain.
I believe that all of this consolidating is done by different parts of the brain to the parts that we usually use during the day. It's like a day and a night shift; the night shift has fewer people in it, but then not as many people are needed, and then can get on and tidy up and prepare for the day shift without the usually interruptions the day shift experience. In the morning, as you wake up the night shift leaves and the day shift begins. Is this making sense?

Anyway, I think that this mornings lunchbox incident happened because my brain was at shift handover time. The night shift, having done their work, were clocking off, while the day shift were just turning up to work. And for the briefest of moments, while the night shift left and the day shift arrived, and they passed each other by the clocking in machine (exchanging nods of recognition),  my brain was left unattended. And in that moment, my lunchbox got put in the cupboard with the Ryvita without my realising it.
It is quite possible the the suggestion to put the lunchbox in the cupboard was made by a group of bad ideas, who have held a grudge ever since being sacked from the day shift for poor work performance.

Quick note - it's 4:06pm and the sun has come out. I hope it's a good weekend weather wise. And everything else wise of course. If I wrote off my car, had my wallet stolen, found my home broken into and then set alight, I would find little comfort in the fact that "it's nice out".

I wouldn't say that I am a huge fan of American sit-coms. I like "Friends" (who didn't), and do enjoy a recent discovery, "Mike & Molly" - but considering the quantity of shows out there, the ones I like are few and far between.
However, I do have a favourite. "Frasier" is by far the one sitcom I can watch all day, everyday. For those of you who know what this programme is, it is a spin off from the 80's series "Cheers", and stars Kelsey Grammar (below) as the radio psychiatrist Dr Frasier Crane.

The Show is set in Seattle, where Frasier lives quite a luxurious lifestyle as somewhat of a celebrity - he has a prime apartment, he enjoys the finest wines and restaurants, and he regularly goes to the Opera. Always striving for perfection, he is somewhat hampered by his ex-cop father, Martin Crane who lives with him - along with his dog, Eddie. Frasier's brother, Niles is a regular of the show and is madly in love with Martin Crane's live in phsyiotherapist, Daphne.
The Elitism, and pompousness of Fraiser in counteracted by the humorous situations he ends up in. While I admit that I don't understand the many references to classical music or the arts, or psychiatry that abound in the programme, the relationship between the main characters is a joy to behold, and the comedy is plain to see.

I would agree that it is not everyone's cup of tea - but I like it.

I have noticed, that there is a distinct bias in terms of the use of animal names to describe Men and Women.
The Women get all the good names, and men get all the bad names. Think about it - Bridget Bardot was referred to as a "Sex Kitten", an sexually attractive female can be called a "Fox" or a "Vixen", or a "Minx". More recently, older women have been given the name "Cougar". Today I misheard a woman saying she was going for a pamper weekend. I thought she said "Panther" weekend, and I wondered was this a weekend for women who were one up from "Cougar"? My mind boggled at what might go on at these weekends!!

So Women in general are called complimentary names. What do men get called? We are given such loving references as "Worm", "maggot", "Pig", "Snake", "weasel", "Shrimp". Surely that is not fair! There must be nicer animal names you ladies can give us? What about "Tiger" or "Falcon", or "Three-Toed Sloth"?

Well, maybe not the last one.

I appreciate it's not easy. And I am fully aware of the fact that not all the names we give women are complimentary, which is partly why I have not listed them. All I am saying is how about some equality in the use of animal names for each other?. Can't we all just get along??

Well, another weekend is here. Tomorrow (Saturday) I will be doing some work in the garden. I don't do gardening - I don't have green fingers, so this is a first for me. Before you start applauding and calling me Alan Titchmarsh, I must tell you that 95% of my garden is concrete. The "work" I will be doing will be mainly pruning, and sweeping up leaves. It's not much, but for me it's a start.

This weekend I will also be attempting to improve the appearance of this blog. I know it is already a delight to read, but I have seen some other blogs, and they look awesome. So hopefully, I can make this one even more appealing.

Enjoy your weekend, and remember to catch up with my blog tomorrow and Sunday.


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